I feel like I'm mature enough in my faith to walk into my church service knowing that regardless of my circumstances, He is always worthy of my time and worship; that at minimum, I should come to offer Him that much. But there are days when I come with little to offer and in a state of desperation....days when my soul cries out from the time I walk in the door for God to please meet the need in my heart or circumstance. I need you, Jesus. Please help me.
Today, I came with a need. I needed the fear; the fear that was paralyzing me, to go away. I knew walking in that it was possible as all things are when I ask and trust Him.
I couldn't wait to make my way to the alter today. He HAD to meet me there. He just had to.
I walked up and took the hands of one of the members of the prayer team and before I could even share my need, I was surrounded by women of faith. Not just any women. These are women who model a faith I aspire to. Fierce women. Fierce in a good way. And they were praying for us. My boys and I were the focus of the prayers of the righteous. Intense. Amazing. Prayer.
Initially, I was sobbing. Desperate for the peace that I typically know in Him. Desperate for the fear to subside.
And all I can say is that as these women stood in the gap; interceded on my behalf; spoke the promises of God over me and my children....I could breathe. The tears continued to fall but became tears of relief instead of pain.
"Where two or three are gathered, there I am among them", He promised.
He kept His promise today as He always does. He was in every word spoken and every tear that fell. And the enemy of my soul, the one who would've loved to see me suffocated by the "what ifs" going through my head, was put back into his place today.
I can't say that I am looking forward to Tuesday, but today I have returned to the familiar place where I know God is in control; where the fear is subject to the truth.
I am proof today, once again, that prayer works. And the boys and I have been the subject of prayers from so many through this. If you are reading this and have offered prayer on our behalf, please know, there are no words to express my gratitude.
Until next time....
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